I have been busy working away recently on researching gaming. Games these days have not just a storyline attached, but in a lot of cases a world of lore and mythology (anyone who has played an Elder Scrolls game could probably name at least one of the gods). But older games don’t have such a rich back story, or any story at all. So, basically speaking, I wrote them.
What I wrote in no way reflect what the publishers/developers/cooks/plumbers/anybody else might have actually intended, and they are meant to be farcical. I also kept them fairly short, and in the style that you would hope to read on an instruction booklet (if you hope for such things at all).
So, without further paragraphs to skim through, the main article.
Potential story for Space Invaders (1978)
“The year is 1992, and war is rife between Canada and the United States. The northern states of the United States are holding strong, but Canada is fighting just as strong. The Prime Minister of Canada and the President of the United States are equally matched in strategic prowess.
The Canadian government issues a reward for the demise of the President, and top assassins clamour for the position. They are all sent, with the promise of riches for the successful, and it isn’t long before an assassin aims true and infects the President with a techno-virus, designed to destroy his heart. As the clock slowly ticks by, he becomes weaker, and agrees to an experimental procedure.
Top scientists shrink a tank down to a molecular level, and inject it into the Presidents bloodstream. Slowly, the tank makes it’s way to the heart, with the objective of destroying all of the invaders. The four ventricles of the heart can be repaired, but no trace of the virus must remain in order to save the Presidents life.
Now more than ever, Uncle Sam needs YOU!”
Potential story for Pac-Man (1980)
A chemical plant, a known manufacturer of anaesthetics, is rumoured to be haunted, and the workers refuse to return. The upper brass of the company believe it to be nothing more than a hallucination, caused by the forming of a new enhanced painkiller, but hires a specialist to ease the workers fears… that specialist is the Poltergeist Advanced Capture man.
The Poltergeist Advanced Capture (PAC) man steps into the factory, alone. But after a few hours in the confusing and darkened hallways, he becomes lost and hungry, trapped. He begins to eat what he finds nearby – painkillers. They are strong, and ease his fears. But after only a few moments, they begin to take effect; he becomes gluttonous, addicted, and hallucinates colourful apparitions. The demons are quick, and close in on him, flaring his senses. Terrified of these relentless “Ghosts”, he flees until he finds a large tablet, the dosage far higher than he can handle. But the destruction it wreaks on his perception helps him fight the demons he faces, whether they are real or not…
You play as the PAC man, as he enters numerous levels of worsening psychosis, fighting and biting everything that looks threatening or edible. Can you find the source of the disturbance, or will you be lost forever in the maze?
Potential story for Dig-Dug (1982)
“Beasts roam the land, destroying vast swathes of humanity, leaving only emptiness in the cities. One man, hidden in a bunker, fights the suppression. Believing the world to be safe in the hands of the general government, he has only basic tools at his disposal, but has a plan.
In the caverns beneath the Earth, outside of the bunker, lurk beasts of unimaginable horror, breathing fire and slinking their way eternally towards the cement shelter, unstoppable and menacing. But a hose, a lawn dart and a bicycle pump, along with a white suit from an Evel Knievel Halloween costume, change everything. The fight is on, and it is time to reclaim the surface world for humanity. It’s time to lead the final charge!”
Potential story for Gradius (1985)
“The pilot approached the machine that loomed before him. Today was his day to pass the test, and he had studied the Gravity Resistant Atmospheric Deployment and Instrument Utilising Simulator. The test department called it Gradius for short, and it was the pride of the US government.
As he stepped into the machine, he did not know that this was not just a simulator anymore. It had been wired for action, and he was the test pilot for its first space mission against the bio-weapons orbiting the Earth. He was flying a one of a kind ship that could install new weapon arrays based on technology it encountered, a learning ship with no Artificial Intelligence. It was a marvel of mankind, and it was their only hope.
Lead the brave pilot and the test-ship Gradius through the solar system, and battle the alien organisms amassing over the Earth! Will you accept the mission, soldier?”